Have you ever wondered why you do the things you do? I mentioned before that I question everything we do just because, and particularly I've been thinking about communication. Why do we communicate the way we do? Do we even recognize it? Is there a better way?
Every thing that we do, not just our words, communicates something. In fact things that we don't do often times communicates more than what we do. Apologies never given, gratefulness never shown, attention never offered, or devotion never committed to; these are all passive offenders we communicate too often.
It's one of the most painful things for me personally to find that I've done something selfish. My whole world operates around the idea that doing for others is far more rewarding and important than doing for myself. Yet by some selfishness deep within I offend, dismiss, or demerit by omission. It was the last time this happened that I realized how we communicate reflects why we communicate.
Do you carry a cellphone because you might need to reach someone while you're out, or because someone might need to reach you while your out? The difference is subtle but the reliability of your cellphone is not. If it's for others to reach you then you'll make sure your cell phone is with you, it's turned on, and the battery is charged. If it's for you then you might just not really be too worried about it.
Do you ask someone how their day went because you are concerned, or because you want to tell them how yours went? If it's for them you'll actually pay attention to the answer no matter how long and show sympathy, excitement, or encouragement. If it's for you then you might just check out mentally until you think it might be your turn to let it out.
Do you respond to emails as soon as you receive them, or days, weeks, months later? If it's for them then you'll reply to them at their convenience. If it's for you then you'll reply at your convenience.
These are just a couple of personal examples I've been the offender or offended on. There are a lot more like the way we communicate with servers at restaurants, the way we talk about politics or religion, or the way we don't say a word when we should be taking up for someone or something.
How we communicate is determined by why we communicate, and I want to communicate for others. I want to build others up and not tear them down. I want to care for what others care about and show it. I want to be supportive and generous. I want to hear more than I want to be heard. I want to be wise AND humble. I don't want to be selfish. I want to be available and accessible. And if I'm ever condescending again slap me. Seriously.
When we all meet at the communication station every day I want to fulfill my purpose to love and serve others. Care to join me?
