Communication Station

Have you ever wondered why you do the things you do? I mentioned before that I question everything we do just because, and particularly I've been thinking about communication. Why do we communicate the way we do? Do we even recognize it? Is there a better way?

Every thing that we do, not just our words, communicates something. In fact things that we don't do often times communicates more than what we do. Apologies never given, gratefulness never shown, attention never offered, or devotion never committed to; these are all passive offenders we communicate too often.

It's one of the most painful things for me personally to find that I've done something selfish. My whole world operates around the idea that doing for others is far more rewarding and important than doing for myself. Yet by some selfishness deep within I offend, dismiss, or demerit by omission. It was the last time this happened that I realized how we communicate reflects why we communicate.

Do you carry a cellphone because you might need to reach someone while you're out, or because someone might need to reach you while your out? The difference is subtle but the reliability of your cellphone is not. If it's for others to reach you then you'll make sure your cell phone is with you, it's turned on, and the battery is charged. If it's for you then you might just not really be too worried about it.

Do you ask someone how their day went because you are concerned, or because you want to tell them how yours went? If it's for them you'll actually pay attention to the answer no matter how long and show sympathy, excitement, or encouragement. If it's for you then you might just check out mentally until you think it might be your turn to let it out.

Do you respond to emails as soon as you receive them, or days, weeks, months later? If it's for them then you'll reply to them at their convenience. If it's for you then you'll reply at your convenience.

These are just a couple of personal examples I've been the offender or offended on. There are a lot more like the way we communicate with servers at restaurants, the way we talk about politics or religion, or the way we don't say a word when we should be taking up for someone or something.

How we communicate is determined by why we communicate, and I want to communicate for others. I want to build others up and not tear them down. I want to care for what others care about and show it. I want to be supportive and generous. I want to hear more than I want to be heard. I want to be wise AND humble. I don't want to be selfish. I want to be available and accessible. And if I'm ever condescending again slap me. Seriously.

When we all meet at the communication station every day I want to fulfill my purpose to love and serve others. Care to join me?

Standing in the Shadows of Giants

Racism is alive and well. Considering how recently slavery was abolished, and how recently Martin Luther King Jr. campaigned his dream, this shouldn't be surprising. But every time I walk with free steps, in my free life, in this free world to a place where I hear words of bondage I am still surprised. There are people whose minds, hearts, and therefore words are still in bondage to closed mindedness, tradition, intolerance, hate, and ignorance. Where's the change?

The inauguration is tomorrow and Obama has been championing "change". Some are far quicker to mock the statement than to question their own perspective of it. We instantly think things like "how's one man going to really change anything". He was the first to admit in his victory speech, "This victory alone is not the change we seek - it is only the chance for us to make that change. And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were. It cannot happen without you. So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism; of service and responsibility where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves, but each other." We the people make change.

When Sir Isaac Newton was asked of his great scientific achievements he said, "...If I have seen a little further it is by standing on the shoulders of Giants." He was essentially acknowledging the blessing of having a foundation placed , and a way paved, by those who exercised passion in his field before him. After finding that all of these pioneers and visionaries had made their discoveries he did not quit because so much had already been accomplished by them. It is because of their work that he could accomplish great new things. They served as inspiration for his ability. They served as headway in his thoughts. They were the backbone to his quest. Ultimately he achieved a status and name greater than many of his mentors before him, but it was only possible (or at least probable) by recognizing the works of these great men and the advantages they gave him.

We all have the opportunity, just like Martin Luther King Jr., just like Sir Isaac Newton, and just like President elect Barrack Obama have, to stand on the sacrifices made by great men before us. By standing on the shoulders of these great men we can reach new heights. We can continue where martyrs of cause left off. We can finish building bridges our forefathers began building, so that our children may cross them. Our freedom has been bought and payed for by blood, sweat, tears, and lives. What will we do with it? What will all that has been earned be exercised for?

Just because discrimination and intolerance exist that doesn't mean that victory over them does not. It smolders in each of us ready to burst into flame for those willing to carry the torch. Hearing people's insults of racism and cruelty is a worthy sacrifice I am willing to bare for the sake of the same freedom of speech that others use to make our world a better place. Let's use their remarks as a reminder of where we've been and where we are going. Let's open our voices and spread our hearts on the subjects that grip us and inspire us. As Martin Luther King Jr. said, "...the greatest tragedy...was not the strident clamor of the bad people, but the appalling silence of the good people".

By the guiding light of our God-given purpose we are growing. The soil is fertile because of the ground that has already be broken. We are all the same color when standing in the shadows of giants.

My Personal Time Machine

I find myself putting a great deal of thought in to the future. It can be one of the most crippling problems I have. I often procrastinate when it comes to things I should do, and even things I want to do, because I think there's a better opportunity yet to come. It helps me to get through the present when I have such a productive and profitable future ahead of me. But will I ever actually see this future if I'm just getting through the present?

Another time travel dilemma people suffer from is the past. "I'm not trying that because I'm not good at it." We too often let history haunt our present and predetermine our future. If we let the past determine our future what's the point in even having a present?

In either case we end up in the exact same situation we've always been in. If we cast the focus of our future constantly ahead of us then we don't even notice it when it flies by as the present. If we focus on the past we don't even realize that past is being determined by us ignoring the present. We make the same choices even when the choice is to not make one.

Present tense shouldn't be left up to cruise control. We have to live now. But it's easier said than done, especially when now is so over(under)whelming. It's so much easier to ignore it, get through it, or waste it even when we know there's more to life than wasting it. How can we change this way of thinking (or lack of it)?

I've realized that time machines do exist and they are right inside of our minds. We can go anywhere we want by focusing on it. If you want to live in the past then focus on it, and your life will be as it was in the past. If you want to live in the future then focus on it and your life will be as it would be without ever changing the present. See the rules to time travel seem a little unfair. You don't get to shortcut through life, just skip living. You can't go back and change the past, just relive it. It's not using the time machine that makes it so great. It's realizing this time machine exists.

See God doesn't need time, he always is and will always be. He created time for us so that we can figure out our purpose. If there were no time than there would be no past and there would be no future. Therefore there would be no accomplishments, no goals met, and no lessons learned. Without a start and a finish there would be no distance traveled, no journey, and no purpose. God created time and even a time machine so that we can find ourselves exactly where He wants us. Here and now.

I want to use the past and the future to my advantage. I want to use them to hone in on where I should be now and what I should be doing. If we really think that God strategically placed us in the now, and for a purpose, it allows us to truly live. What could you or should you be doing here and now? What is your purpose? You might find they end up aligning when you take a trip outside of the time machine.

Blank Pages

That's what you get when you start a blog before the holidays, blank pages. I've been so consumed with all of the 'stuff' it's been difficult to set aside time to write. On top of my usual duties I've spent my days "off" building not 1, not 2, but 3 websites. I'm trying to quit my day job, trying to start a business, fighting for a small inheritance, and taking the tint off my windows before court on Tuesday. We've visited the families (most but certainly not all). I've given lessons in Adobe After Effects until 5 in the morning ...twice. We've had staff parties and everyone parties and for the first time I enjoyed both. It's like all the things one would do throughout a year we did in a month.

Often when I pray I pray for wisdom. I recognize that a fair amount of people do as well. Whether it be because of a big decision that lies ahead or all of the little ones that lie in between. But sometimes we ask as if there is some amount of knowledge, or ability to manipulate that knowledge, that will take away the difficulty and fear of these decisions.

I personally began asking for wisdom daily when I was about 12. I just didn't want to make the same mistakes everyone else was making. My parents, my friends, and certain in betweens seemed so prone to making mistakes that I felt they'd made enough to cover my quota as well. I wanted to learn from them, not just what to do, but what not to do. Ever since then I've had this wisdom (whether or not I've known it) and have been learning from those smarter than me as well as those as smart as me sans wisdom.

But even with all the wisdom God has offered I've just recently had the wisdom to see why I still make the wrong choices and fear uncertainty. God's wisdom shows us the path that is right, but our faith determines the path we'll take. To say that wisdom=wise decisions is to say that knowing what to do=doing it. But the transition between wisdom and wise decisions is a step of faith. This step requires faith that what you think God is leading you to do is really God's leading, that no matter your choice He will follow that path with you, and when you get down that road He will undoubtedly meet your new found needs with unrelenting provision. Faith is the opposite of fear. They both motivate your actions either to run scared (down the easy path or away from the decision completely) or to boldly take the path less traveled, the right one.

I don't want to pray for wisdom when I'm really asking God to make my way be the right way. Because the fact is I already have the wisdom to know what is right I just lack the guts (self control motivated by faith with boldness) to do something about it. I'm really asking for God to show me another way out. A way that's a little closer to what I think I can handle, or what I want to be the right way. God's wisdom is ultimately wasted if we ignore it and choose our way instead.

Today I'm met with two blank pages. The one I'm already filling with this blog and this new year that we're already filling with our decisions. I know without a doubt or an ounce of uncertainty the things that I should do this year and even mostly how to do them. Wisdom granted. Now I'm praying for boldness, courage, patience, self control, and peace so that by faith I can do what is right in 2009. Don't worry I'm praying the same for you too. I hope this finds you well and that when our new paths cross you're having a Happy New Year!

Mondayne

I'm the guy that questions everything. If it exists, if people unanimously agree it's ok, I have asked why. A lot of people do things simply because they're told to, or because they see others do them. What's funny to me is they don't stop and observe the results of what people do, they are content in doing it just because "it's what you do".

So I ask about Monday, what's so bad about Monday?

Hey, bob, how's it going?

Well, it's a Monday.

People blame this day of the week for their bad attitudes, crappy circumstances, and sub par work ethic. As if it's the Sabbath of trying. Trying is what we do the rest of the week, right? It's time for a break from trying! Though sometimes it appears that way I think there's more to it.

I think Monday is just the scapegoat for perceived failures. It's a seven day loop point that reminds us of what we have, but mainly have not, accomplished in the past seven days. I mean God created everything in six days and actually got to rest once a week. What did we do? We can actually accomplish quite a bit in that time and I think when we get up on Monday morning and see that we haven't we become bitter. We're bitter at the dead end job, the financial circumstance, or the strained relationship that didn't get resolved in the past week which leaves us greeting Monday with an "oh, it's you again". But instead of beating ourselves up, or beating up Monday on our behalves, let's try something different.

I think creating a happy occasion brightens everyone's day. Think about if Christmas or your birthday fell on a Monday. We wouldn't be thinking about how bad Monday was! We'd look forward to it even throughout the weekend.

Why not create some sort of Monday tradition? Maybe you could buy a special breakfast you wouldn't normally. Even better maybe you could buy breakfast for all of your coworkers. Buying a free biscuit breakfast for my coworkers costs about $12 and brightens everyone's Monday. It's always worth it.

I present that we make Monday more than mundane and make it a day of blessing. I challenge you to do something nice for someone else, no matter how big or small, today and every Monday and see if it changes how you think about Mondays. I think we'll find that the less we think about ourselves, and the more we think about helping others, the more we'll feel like we've really accomplished something over the week and the better Monday's will be for us and everyone we come in contact with.

Now what shall we call it now that Mondayne doesn't work? Help me find a new name for our weekly day of giving or at least make a name for it in your actions. Happy Monday!

Today's Church Scam Takes The Cake

"My name's Deacon So and So. and uhm, Mike Somebody is the bishop and we're with Church Inc and we're trying to raise some money for a 12 year old boy who is getting a kidney transplant at that hospital right up there."

"Where are you located?"

"Oh, we're everywhere we got a church in Dothan, in Panama, in Pensacola we're everywhere. I've got some cakes in the car and I'm selling them for $20 a piece. The money goes to that 12 year old boy."

1.) He wouldn't give the boys name, not even his first
2.) The hospital mentioned does not do kidney transplants (a doctor's wife confirmed)
3.) What church with four locations can't afford to help without going door to door in four cities? (rhetorical)
4.) The church has no website, exact address, or phone number (or name for that matter)
5.) Church Inc. really?

People often try to scam the church which always leaves me in disgust. I get all sorts of emails from Africa telling how some nun had a secret lover who was a wealthy diplomat. They both found real salvation and he died. Now she has cancer and wants to see her $1.5million invested into a good Christian church. Just send the church's account number and you'll never worry about money again. Because you won't have any! It's like a steamy romance novel with a price tag the size of your current balance.

But, like today's scam, it goes both ways. It never fails to leave me with an awkward, bad feeling when someone trys to scam in the name of the church. Whether by "fundraising", in "God told me to tell you"s, or false promises "churches" are creatively taking people's money and leaving them feeling taken advantage of.

Don't Christians have enough of a bad rap to overcome without their help? The conception is already that condemnation is our sole purpose. To have malicious thievery added to that is a crime dually. "You're not good enough the way you are, you don't dress right, you don't act right, and you don't belong here. So empty your pockets and leave!"

Pastor Gene has mentioned it before, if these televangelists really believed there was a faith machine that when you put in $100 you got back $1000, then they would be sending you a $100 bill, not asking for yours! We furthered that thought last night. There are people who genuinely need help. We can't wait for them to wander up, we have to go to them. NOT to ask for money, or what they could do for us, but what we can do for them. We don't need door to door salespeople at Crossroads because what we're selling is free!

Join me in praying for people who take advantage of people and who smear the name of the church, or worse Jesus (it will make it easier to stop being mad at them). Then join me in setting things right. One example at a time we can show people the relationship the church is supposed to have with people. Love.

Excuse me while I cool off. I'm going to go eat some lemon cake now.

Why Do Chickens Crossroads?

People tend to be afraid of things that are intended to be liberating. Like flying on an airplane. Like riding a roller coaster. Like the big hat buckle wearers who fled religion to practice their brand of faith in the freedom of a New World. No this isn't a late Thanksgiving message. But doesn't it feel strange somewhere inside that people should ever feel they have to be afraid of an oppressing religion? Yet if you think about it in the context of your life you might find a similar story.

The last church we were at...

If you've been a church goer for any length of time then you probably hear this fragment come out of your mouth right before a complaint from time to time. Perhaps it didn't feel oppressive but having left your old way of doing things in the church world you now feel liberated. Or maybe you are one of those former die hard volunteers or full-time staff members that actually did feel oppressed occasionally. In either case a body of people can easily turn a faith in to a religion of rules and rituals that stifle the freedom that faith once held. But instead of being a complainer feel the call to action. Let your holy discontent grow you in to a purpose driven believer.

It's these observations and this discontent that fueled Crossroads. It's not that we were attending somewhere horrible where they were slinging whips and locking shackles. We just had the realization that the church that was in our hearts was not for everyone. It couldn't be superimposed on another churches structure or name. And to do it we had to start something new, somewhere new. The bricks made of 'what would this be like?' the mortar of 'why not?' we began building a church that God had been training our hearts for for years.

It's not easy at all though. I just thought it was hard work on full-time staff elsewhere. Our volunteers work harder than a lot of paid gigs and I'm infinitely grateful. They wake up at the butt crack of dawn to be ready for action by 7am. They turn a cinema into a church and back every week. Why? The same reason we started this thing. No matter how hard it is it's worth it. The freedom is worth fighting for. So we fight anger, disappointment, letdowns, no-shows, worry, stress, financial hardships, fatigue, and more because it's all worth it to do church the way God put it in our hearts. And while it would be worth it to see one life changed we've seen countless lives changed and they're growing in numbers. But it's still hard.

Why do chickens Crossroads? Because they became tired of being afraid to ask questions and take steps. They began the journey as chickens and with every difficult step they grow stronger and more confident. They grow in to something else. The real answer? Chickens don't Crossroads, Roadies do! Yeah boi!

Why do you Crossroads?
(feel free to add a comment no matter how old this post is)